Karla Sofia Gascon wants to be in the light.
In English, she asks the restaurant waiter for a sunlit table.
In Spanish, she turns to me and says, self-mockingly, I seem likela Sofia Vergarawith my accent.
“I’ve learned that my work needs to speak for itself,” says Gascón.Toni Sorvent*
But I guess its part of the appeal.
They look at me with a weird face.
While Gascon has no experience trafficking drugs, her onscreen counterpart would have good reason to be concerned.
But now, I truly dont give a fuck about anything.
I see it as a fun game to play.
GASCON, 52, WAS BORN in Spain and raised near Madrid.
Her biggest break came when she played Peter, the money-hungry boyfriend, in the 2013 filmNosotros Los Nobles.
All the while, she was grappling with her true identity.
(I swear Ive deleted a bunch!
she says when I say I stalked her Instagram.)
Gascon says she poured her entire soul into the film.
I didnt know what I was going to face, Gascon says of meeting the more established stars.
I was like, Here come the extraterrestrials.
They could destroy your planet or make it better…
But, to her surprise, Gomez and Saldana were welcoming and down-to-earth.
Ive met a lot of girls in Mexico who act more like divas than the two of them.
Working with Zoe and Selena has been such a pleasure, she adds.
Thats Jacques, the director, Gascon says, waving at Audiard with a laugh.
Initially, she found the script too frivolous.
The day we met in Paris, he asked me, What do you think?
And he said, You fucker!
The first script was a lot more comedy, and that worried me.
It was going to be a completely different film.
She felt strongly that it needed to grapple more fully with the trans experience in all its complexity.
If Manitas transitioned just to flee justice, she adds, then the entire thing wouldve been a joke.
It wouldve been a pure comedy for people to laugh in theaters without anything transcendental.
It wouldve been a film that the LGBTQ community wouldve said What is this?
She confesses that shes even suggested they make a prequel.
Im serious, she says.
Ive told him that there are things I wish I couldve seen, but I cant tell you.
I never regressed to anything, she explains.
I play a character that isnt me.
then who would play that role?
What kind of an actress would I be?
My journey was dark and complicated.
And that killed me, she explains.
I was left alone…
It was such a dark experience that brought me to the verge of suicide.
I had believed that they lovedme, not a piece of meat.
Its not just anti-trans critics who express their opinions.
She says shes taken heat from all sides simply for living her experience her own way.
I probably do some things that even my community wouldnt love, she says.
People have told me Why dont you do your makeup?
If you wanted to be a woman so bad, why dont you do your makeup?
Gascon understands the critique.
Kidnappings, bad people, drug traffickers exist everywhere.
Why do we focus on Mexico so much?
Probably because its next to the U.S., which is where people pay the most to do drugs.
Emilia was the only character who, as Gascon puts it, you couldnt justify being from somewhere else.
She adds, A Mexican drug trafficker not from Mexico wouldnt make sense.
Talking with her today, its almost impossible to imagine how she downplayed her Madrileno Spanish.
Her daughter, Victoria Elena, has become a favorite at her red carpet events.
Gascons eyes gleam as she talks of Victoria, who apparently buddied up withDunedirector Denis Villeneuve during one festival.
Everyone is asking me about her instead of me!
Professionally, theres going to be a clear before and afterEmilia Perezfor Gascon, and she knows it.
And lately, shes been telling everyone wholl listen that she wants to play a James Bond villain.
She even met Barbara Broccoli, who produces the 007 films.
But nope, the first role offer I got was about something very tough related to transness.
And you know what I said?
With a cackle, she adds, Some things are so beautiful that you cant say no.
