Kelsey McKinneymight be one of the most famous names in the gossip game.
When, not if.
There was a young woman who dressed as a Boston Marathon bombing victim for Halloween.
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All of this is gossip.
Discussion of strangers online, even with other strangers online, is gossip.
Take, for example, the joy of snooping.
There is almost no greater pleasure in my life than being asked to help obtain gossip.
Lets say a friend meets a cutie at the bar.
They dont know the cuties last name.
All they have is a first name, a physical description, and a crush.
I am cracking my knuckles just thinking about this made-up but frequent scenario.
I am settling in on the couch with my laptop, and we are going hunting, baby.
It is one of my proudest moments.
They did not, unfortunately, get married.
The internet is what you (and others) make of it.
Perhaps earlier in the rise of social media, that ability felt like justice.
In those early days [of social media], the collective fury felt righteous, powerful and effective.
But theyre also gossip in outcome.
Gossip reinforces social norms within tight-knit communities it is an extralegal solution to enforce the communitys ideals and powers.
The central tower would be subject to periodic observation by the public.
He envisioned everyone watching one another as a kind of police state to create good behavior.
The communal aspect of gossip is how we create and perpetuate norms within our groups.
Say our society has decided that wearing blue is immoral and bad.
No blue is allowed here!
In modern-day American society, wearing blue is fine, but something almost universally disliked is being a fuckboy.
Lets take the contemporary cautionary tale of West Elm Caleb as an example.
The video itself is vague, but she captioned it This ones dedicated to Caleb.
The video had a subject, the ambiguous Caleb.
Ironically, this was not the Caleb that Shou had gone on a date with.
She had been ghosted by another tall NYC Caleb.
This is not a crime.
This is barely even a faux pas in the realm of dating.
Buoyed by their camaraderie, women revealed his last name and posted his dating profile on TikTok.
Strangers began commenting on the official West Elm Instagram page.
This video got more than 2.5 million views.
As a fictional character (which to most people he was), he could be purely evil.
The witch hunt against him could continue unabated until the internet found a new target.
A life had been ruined.
What was it for: just some social media drama?
I think our natural disposition as humans is to plod along until we get old and stop.
But with social media weve created a stage for constant artificial high dramas.
Every day a new person emerges as a magnificent hero or a sickening villain.
Telling stories about other private citizens online without regard for discretion or their best interest can be profitable.
Everything and everyone is content, baby.
The public is now a stage on which I can perform.
We have created our own surveillance state willingly, and we applaud ourselves for doing so.
Its a severely capitalistic and consumeristic mindset to use the joy of snooping as a form of punishment.
Applying gossip as a regulatory force to strangers has the potential to create harm.
The mob that trails West Elm Caleb knows neither morality nor mercy.
There is no end to the aim of the group.
What exactly did society want from this man?
Or from Couch Guy?
Or from any other Main Character?
A mutual shared enemy on which to project all its fears of and frustrations with the modern dating scene?
Do we want the internets equivalent of Cersei paraded naked through the streets while everyone yells Shame!?
He did not respond to my email, and I cannot say that I blame him.
I wouldnt respond to me, either.
Copyright 2025 by Kelsey McKinney.
Used by arrangement with Grand Central Publishing, a division of Hachette Book Group, Inc. All rights reserved.
